composing blocks, part one

For me, composing goes alot easier if I am asked to compose a piece for a specific purpose. There doesn't have to be money involved, although that is great when it happens. But to be needed, to have my creative efforts desired, this motivates me amazingly well. I've worked a bit on fabricating this desire during times when no one else is asking, and sometimes that even works. I like to know what the situation is I'm writing for: who will be playing, where will it be performed, etc., and if it is a "rush" job, I am even more motivated and excited and prolific. On the other hand, any lack of self-confidence translates quickly into a slump, a block of the flow of ideas and structures and sounds and textures. And any outright rejection of my musical ideas seems to kill the flow completely. So I've learned to keep "secrets".

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